A word from our coaches

5 Tips to Being Happy Over the Holidays 

Most of us have the idea that the holidays are “supposed” to be happy. We have expectations of harmonious family gatherings, extravagant presents and peace and joy for all. But for many people, these expectations are far from reality. Death of a family member, loss of a job, the ending of a relationship are all things that can affect our holiday cheer.

Regardless of what you have faced over the past year or what you are currently facing, there is a way to be happy over the holiday season and here are my 5 top tips on how:

1.   Don’t buy into other people’s drama.
 How much do you allow other people’s lives to get intertwined in yours? 98% of your thoughts, feelings and emotions are not your own; you are picking them up from the people around you. Ask yourself “Who does this belong to?” to help you determine the thoughts and feelings that are actually yours.

2.   It’s ok to be different. 
There is a lot of pressure at holiday time to get along with family members and other individuals, but instead of conforming to appease people, it is better to acknowledge and celebrate what is different about you. What if your difference is the greatness of you? The thing that can make valuable change in the world? Embrace your difference and ask yourself, “What is different about me that is wonderful about me?”

3.   Make a list of everything you are thankful for in the year.
Why wait until New Years? Gratitude is one of the greatest creators of happiness there is and when you focus on what you are grateful for, more of what you are grateful for has a way of showing up.

4.   Don’t try to fix things for unhappy people.
Spending time with family can be stressful. Let others be unhappy if they chooseHappiness is a choice, so you do not need to take responsibility for others’ unhappiness. If others are unhappy, it’s not your job to change it. “It’s your job to be happy which shows them that there are other choices available, if and when they want a different choice.

5.   Ask questions.
According to founder of Access Consciousness® Gary Douglas, “Choice and question are the few things that will change everything.” And, “Questions open all doors.”
When you ask questions, you open the door for something new to show up. Questions like, “What else is possible?” Or “How does it get any better than this? Or, “I wonder what it would take for this holiday season to turn out better than I could imagine?”

The holidays can be a time of joy and cheer. Truly! Don’t take on other people’s stuff. Be willing to ask questions and choose what works for you. When you choose to be happy, you invite others to do the same. Maybe the will. Maybe they won’t. Either way, YOU get to enjoy the holiday season.

Dain Heer

Dr. Dain Heer is an internationally renowned author, speaker and facilitator of consciousness and change. His latest book is 'Being You, Changing the World - Is Now the Time?'. For over 14 years Dain has been inviting people to embrace their true greatness.

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